Life Copies Satire

For my ginger friend, Mr Wadsworth, and a reminder to not use South Park for actual policy. I mean WTF?? But it is even more extreme than that as they have banned daywalkers as well. Is this not a hoax? Says 15 April. And the 'vast majority' of parents support this as well. If it true then seriously WTF?
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/redhead-banned-school-just-weeks-5525832
Some quotes:

was told she cannot return to lessons until she dyes her hair a more 'natural' colour

"I've had the same colour for the past three years, and nobody at school has commented on it.

"Trinity School sixth-form students are role models for the rest of the school.

"We have a policy of maintaining high standards.
"The vast majority of parents are very keen on our high standards."

Just needs a few adjustments...

The new homeownerist anthem...
Boy! 
Boy!

Now in the street, there is violence
And-and a lots of work to be done
No place to hang out our washing
And-and I can't blame all on The Sun

Oh no, we gonna rock down to Electric Avenue
And then we'll take house prices higher
Oh, we gonna rock down to Electric Avenue
And then we'll take house prices higher

Workin' so hard like a soldier
Can't afford a thing on TV (homes under the hammer)
Deep in my heart, I abhor ya
Can't get food for the kid

Good God, we gonna rock down to Electric Avenue
And then we'll take it higher
Ho, we gonna rock down to Electric Avenue
And then we'll take it higher

Oh, no
Oh, no
Oh, no
Oh, no

Oh God, we gonna rock down to Electric Avenue
And then we'll take house prices higher
Ho, we gonna rock down to Electric Avenue
And then we'll take house prices higher

Who is to blame in one country?
Never can get to the one
Dealin' in multiplication
And they still can't feed everyone

Oh no, we gonna rock down to Electric Avenue
And then we'll take house prices higher
Ho no, we gonna rock down to Electric Avenue
And then we'll take house prices higher

Ho, out in the street
Out in the street
Out in the daytime
Out in the night

Oh, we gonna rock down to Electric Avenue
And then we'll take house prices higher
Ho, we gonna rock down to Electric Avenue
And then we'll take house prices higher

Out in the street
Out in the street
Out in the playground
In the dark side of town (near all the council houses)

Ho, we gonna rock down to Electric Avenue
And then we'll take house prices higher
Hey, we gonna rock down to Electric Avenue
Oh yeah (And then we'll take house prices higher)

Rock it in the daytime (We gonna rock down to Electric Avenue)
Rock it in the night (And then we'll take house prices higher, Electric Avenue)
Rock it in my ya-tee-pa-bombay (We gonna rock down to Electric Avenue)
Whoa, in the Brixton, yeah (And then we'll take house prices higher, Electric Avenue)